Some Things I've Learned

Since becoming a parent, I've learned so many things. Here are just a few:

1. Every item of clothing you own will be covered in slobber and cracker (or other snack) crumbs. I pulled out a jacket I hadn't worn in a while and put it on only to realize the entire right shoulder was covered in some sort of food -- graham crackers or cheerios, I'm sure. They were stuck on good and NOT coming off. I obviously didn't know it had gotten that dirty or I wouldn't have hung it back up in the coat closet. The same goes for pants. Annabelle is always grabbing my legs with little grubby hands, so wearing a pair of pants more than one time before washing is pretty much impossible.

2. Food takes on a whole new flavor if found on the floor. Both of my children are picky eaters. Jacob wasn't always picky, but it seems the older he gets, the less he eats. Annabelle has always been this way. We've gone through many a meal where she rejects any food given to her by spitting it out and throwing it on the floor. When I've had enough and decide to give up, I wipe her hands and face and get her out of the chair. The second her feet hit the floor, she begins to eat all the tiny pieces of food she rejected and threw down. So, she won't eat the food while she's sitting in the chair, but she will eat the food after it's been spit out and thrown on the floor. Apparently it tastes better.

3. I can get my children to eat anything if we "have dinner on the floor." When Jacob was younger, if I was in a hurry and didn't have much time to feed him, I would let him sit on the kitchen floor while I fed him yogurt or something else fast and easy. This trend has continued with Annabelle. Occasionally, when I'm in a hurry to get somewhere, we'll have "dinner on the floor" and when we do, they will eat ANYTHING I serve them. On one such occasion last week, Annabelle ate two slices of lunchmeat and an entire bowl of green beans. This is unheard of. She never eats lunchmeat. And green beans???? Jacob happily gobbled up all his green beans as well and talked about how good they were. What???? Although he used to eat veggies, any green vegetables he consumes now is accompanied with the promise of a "tessert" (dessert). I'm thinking we should just get rid of our kitchen table and the high chair and start having every meal on the floor. The funny thing is, if Annabelle sees me get food from the refrigerator, she now promptly sits down on the floor, expecting to be fed.

4. Bathrooms are fascinating. Ever since Annabelle discovered the toilet and threw Minnie Mouse in for a swim, we've kept the bathroom doors shut at our house. Annabelle is fascinated with the toilet and loves to play in the bathroom. She seizes every opportunity to sneak in. When Jacob uses the potty, he usually comes out with his pants down, asking for help. As soon as Annabelle sees him, she takes off as fast as her little legs can carry her to the bathroom, knowing the door is open and this is her chance. I quickly chase her down the hall and catch her just before she climbs on the stool to look in the mirror or opens the toilet to splash in the water. I caught her in our bathroom once giggling with delight as she splashed her hands in the toilet water. Eeeewww.

5. Chilren are ALWAYS listening. The other day, I decided to bake cookies and enlisted some help from Jacob. While we mixed the batter, we were listening to music. We usually listen to Jacob's music, but on this particular day, I decided I needed some "Mommy music." The playlist consisted of a wide variety of music, which included Alabama's "Dixieland Delight." As the song played, I wasn't really listening and didn't think much of it. All of sudden, Jacob sings, "Make a little oven....make a little oven....Mommy, make a little oven!" I didn't know what he was talking about. "Yes, we are going to put the cookies in the little oven," I said. He continued to sing, "Make a little oven!" It took me just a few more seconds to realize what he was singing. He was singing a line from "Dixieland Delight," but it wasn't "make a little oven" he had heard in the song. Boy, am I glad he interpreted the word as "oven" and not what it really was -- "lovin'." Ok, back to Jacob's music from now on.

I have one more funny moment to share from our cookie baking experience. Before we began, Jacob and I both washed our hands. About midway through, Jacob got down from his chair and ran off as if he were on a mission. He came back, thumb in his mouth, holding Mr. Monkey's cousin. "Jacob," I said, "we are not supposed to put our hands in our mouth while we're cooking. We'll get germs in the food." He quickly held up his other hand and said, " It's ok, Mommy...I can just use this hand to make cookies." Of course.

6. If you let a 15 month old walk around wearing only a diaper, nakedness is just a few short seconds away. Annabelle can now take off her own diaper and is quite proud of her accomplishments. After I change her in the morning, I'll sometimes let Annabelle run around wearing only a diaper until she's eaten breakfast. She is a messy eater, so it's just easier to wipe her down afterwards rather than change her clothes. The other day, I put her down and began to make breakfast. Annabelle came walking into the kitchen wearing nothing but a big, cheezy grin. After a few minutes of searching, I found the missing diaper in the hallway. As soon as I put the new one on, Annabelle began pulling at the tape. No more "only a diaper" for her. She will be clothed 100 percent of the time from here on out.

7. If you pay to have your carpets and furniture professionally cleaned, be prepared to enjoy no more than a half day of cleanliness. Our carpet was beginning to look a bit stained and our furniture was definitely in need of a good cleaning, so we had everything professionally cleaned. With the rough winter we've had in terms of illness (stomach flu twice and what seemed like neverending colds) I thought we were long overdue for this. Everyone in the house was finally better, so it seemed like a good time. After the cleaning, our furniture looked so good. No more milk stains or snot stains or spit stains. Our carpet was clean and fluffy again. Aaaaaaaahhhhh. What a great feeling -- to have clean carpet and furniture. Not for long. Of course, Jacob and Annabelle both got colds immediately after the carpet cleaner left our house. As gross as this may be, I can tell you, furniture doesn't fair well against small children with colds. So, was it worth it? To pay big bucks to have everything clean for only a few hours? I have to say....yes, it was. A few moments of cleanliness is better than none.